I currently feel more sense of a supportive community than I have ever before, and it is a lovely feeling. During my lesbian years I never felt totally connected and supported by the lesbian community. There have been many instances in the past where my sexuality with my appearance has been questioned (“You don’t look like a lesbian”), my dress and my sexuality (“Why do you were skirts?” and “How are we suppose to know you are a lesbian?”), my understanding of LGB culture (“Do you know what your rainbow necklace means?”), and my attendance to lesbian events (“This is a lesbian event, do you know?”) have all been questioned. This has gone on for over a decade. In the general lesbian community in Melbourne, Australia, lesbians showing femme characteristics are looked down upon.
Over three years ago, I was invited to social drinks run by ButchFemmeTrans Melbourne. I now help run this group with two other wonderful people. This group meets up monthly and I look forward to everyone. It is a lovely group of superb people, who totally understand my gender and sexuality, like I do theirs. I have made some wonderful friends. Also this group has been one of the things that continues, unchanging, since Max’s transition.
A few months back there was a special party night for Femmes. It felt wonderful to be celebrated! No one picking on me for wearing a dress to a queer event, no one questioning my sexuality or gender expression, everyone letting me be and celebrating what and who I am.
Also I have met many people in the sex and gender diverse (SGD) community and groups too, that have been very welcoming, giving Max and myself a wonderful sense of belonging. Recently I have started a small social group for partners of trans*. It has only met up twice but already I feel supported and lucky to have such amazing people to be friends with.
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It's been a while since I read your blog but thanks for the recent reminder about it. I've added it to my RSS feed (basically the same as the email updates thing you have), so I'll be notified whenever you post a new entry.
ReplyDeleteIt's really great to hear that you have gained a stronger sense of a supportive community - perhaps an unexpected benefit of Max's transition, especially after initially feeling isolated? I think you've done really well to be so proactive in seeking out like-minded people, and the social group for partners is another really good step in that direction (and of course it benefits others too).
And it's also great that ButchFemmeTrans Melbourne lives on too!
Tom