Going to Brisbane tomorrow

Yesterday Max and I heard from the surgeon's receptionist in regards to making a new appointment. Max was super nice, as he totally understands that, having to cancel the appointments was completely out of their control. Initially, Max could not get an appointment until 16th of February. However a little while later the receptionist called back and told Max that there was a cancelation for this Thursday. She asked if we could organise ourselves to fly up in two days. Max organised it all, so now we are going tomorrow. It is very exciting to get the ball rolling again.

Floods

On Thursday Max and I were suppose to fly to Brisbane for the day so Max could see a surgeon for consultation of top surgery. We booked this nearly 4 months ago, and both of us (Max especially) were looking forward to starting the road to surgery. However, Queensland has suffered from devastating floods, including Brisbane. The hospital cancelled all appointments, and are not rescheduling until things have settled down, which we totally understand. My thoughts are with all Australians who have been affected by floods, including Victorians, Queenslanders and New South Welsh-people. At the moment QLD has been the worst hit.

If you would like to donate to a good cause, here is a link to help affected LGBT Queenslanders

Max's family

This Xmas Max’s mum addressed the Xmas cards to Max. This was so good to see and made him extremely happy. The family are really doing so much better. Max’s mum still comments that Max really hasn't changed much, and this is okay with us, because this means that the transitioning is not scary too her, as she still sees her child. Max’s dad doesn't talk about it, but will say that he is supportive and leaves it at that, again this is fine with us too. Also Max’s brother and sister in law have also told their children. The eldest, who is 10 years old boy, was very interested and seemed to be quiet excepting about it. While the youngest, 7 year old girl, was not interested to talk about it. We are relieved that they have finally told the children.

Max went down to the family farm the day after Boxing Day, I didn’t go. Max’s mother told us that we are not allowed to tell his grandmother about his transition, therefore at the farm he will be called by his birth name. This is one of the reasons why I didn’t go; as I cannot go back to using his birth name (also I was still in grief from my friend’s death). I also think it is a little naive to think that grandma doesn’t know what is going on, but I guess denial can be a powerful force. Max reported when he got back that one night they had a games night and his niece suggested girls vs. boys, and Max stated let’s not do that, and everyone had a big laugh. Even though his niece did not want to hear about the transition, she hardly left Max’s side at the farm. Overall, at the farm everything went really well, and the family are able to see that Max is still the same person, but happier. When he got back, though, he asked me to call him Max a couple of times.

9 months on T

It’s just over 9 months since Max has been on T. He passes all the time and is so much happier. The changes on T are gradual, especially when you see the person every day, as I do. We have been documenting the changes using photos, measurements (arms, waist, legs, butt etc.) voice, hairiness and mood. I have complied all of these into a PowerPoint presentation, and the other day I went back to the start and realised how much he has changed. His shoulders are considerably larger, as are all his muscles (he loves his muscles), fat redistribution is also another major change. When I hug him he feels harder. His jaw line is more prominent, his skin appears rougher, he shaves a few times a week (but admits he should shave every two days). Kissing him on days he has not shaved I can feel the stubble, though it is not as visible as it is going to get. I have to say I really don't have experience kissing people with stubble, because the last time I had a boyfriend was back in high school and he didn’t even have facial hair yet. This is something else to get use to, but I am doing well with coping with the changes. I have adjusted to his lower voice now, and recognise it on the phone, though it is funny when I hear his voice message (recorded 4 months ago) is higher.

Overall I have to admit I am doing really well with the changes. Mostly when he points out another change, for example, more hair on his belly, I always have a bit of a giggle. Watching Max become more confident, more social and so much happier makes it very easy to deal with the changes. Next week we are flying to Brisbane to see a surgeon for a consult for top surgery. Max can’t wait to get his ‘chesticles’ off. I realised that his surgery will bring a big change suddenly as opposed to the gradual changes with T. Oh well, it will be such a relief for Max to have top surgery; no more binding, no more wearing t-shirts during sex, no more avoiding looking in mirrors topless. Top surgery should be some time in April, and Max is counting down.